Friday, April 27, 2018

Tinder for Guinea Pigs


OK, not Tinder, but we did run across the following ad on the Roche internal classified board (click on picture to enlarge):







Translated it basically says: We are looking for an uncastrated male to make offspring with our guinea pig and spend one to two weeks on vacation to make it happen.

Yowza, hubba-hubba, guinea pig love!

Because Switzerland has some of the most stringent animal welfare laws, this ad actually makes sense. You see, Swiss law prohibits owning 'social' pets unless you have two of them, therefore it is illegal to keep just one guinea pig, mouse, ferret, fish, canary, pig or other social creature. Switzerland judges isolation of social animals as abuse. This has created a new area of law: lawyers who defend animals. And it has inspired pet renting services that help owners in case one of a pair dies or they want to avoid a pet-buying cycle, but still stay within the coupling law. Another way to stay within the law is to do what this family is doing, asking to borrow a stud guinea pig to make babies with their little lady so she won't be alone.With those flowers in her hair fur, how can she not get *lucky*.

Here's my version of a Tinder ad for these love birds, er, pigs:
Swiss Sally looking for Hairy Harry
for brief vacation tryst.
No commitment necessary.
Doesn't matter if you like children. 
Big cheeks (on your face) a plus
for seed storage during our dinner dates.

©2018, Bridget Magee. All Rights Reserved.

6 comments:

  1. I love this post about guinea pigs and wish I could view the photo. For some reason, my phone isn't displaying it. Is it against the law for single, social, adults to live alone in Switzerland??

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    1. Thanks for commenting, Jeanette, and for letting me know about the picture. I reformatted it, so hopefully it will work on your phone. And no, I don't think there is a law for single, social adults, but maybe there should be. =)

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  2. Suddenly I'm sad that I have a single goldfish. But I suspect he's too stupid to know he's alone. We have 9 chickens. They exhibit what we call "chicken gravity" --- if any of them get too far from the others, they suddenly sprint back to the group at top speed forming a disorganized galaxy of chickens.

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    1. I've read that the average goldfish (not sure how they would know if it was above/below average?) has an attention span of ~9 seconds. What if every 9 seconds your little goldfish pal was thinking, "Where are my fish friends?" How sad! You must get a school of fish pronto! Also, I think I've seen "chicken gravity" in action on the playground with little people. =)

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  3. Considering the number of dogs in Denver, really everywhere in Colorado, if there was such a law, we would be overrun. I think many do have more than one, sometimes I see people walking 3! Hard to believe the ad, but love yours, Bridget! I wonder if there's a pet food lobby?

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    1. I can't imagine more than one Smidgey - she's like 3 dogs in 1! I don't know if there is a pet food lobby, but I believe the Swiss would form one. Thanks for commenting, Linda! =)

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